Grin Jokes

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Vegetable garden

Monina is tending to her garden but no matter what she’d do to her tomatoes, it still won’t go ripe and still green. Her neighbor

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The Hotdog Slicer

Bert was working in a hotdog factory in Manila. Unknown to his fellow workers, Bert has untoward fantasy. “I want to stick my organ into

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GRO at Elepante

Dok: OMG Miss, what happened to your vagina. Ang laki na ng giwang? GRO: Dok, ne-rape po akong elepante. Dok: O, eh and liit lang

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Mayor at Koleheyala

Si Mayor at and koleheyala pagkatapus mag-sex… Mayor: How much, girl? Koleheyala: 200 pesos only mayor. Mayor: Sure ka, 200 lang. Mabubuhay ka na ba

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Hilutin

Nanay: Anak, sabihin mo nga kay tatay mo na hilutin ako. Anak (Bulol): Tay, tabi daw ni nanay iyutin mo daw sya. Tatay: Sabihin mo

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Pray before sex

An 80-year old pastor had a honeymoon with his young bride… Pastor: Honey, before we do it, we can just pray for guidance. Bride: Honey,

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Sex ni lolo at lola

Apo: Lolo, nagse-sex pa ba kayo ni lola? Lolo: Aba, oo naman apo. Pero yun nga lang “oral sex” na lang. Apo: Talaga po? Lolo: Opo.

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Tiwala lang

Doctor: Sige na miss, hubarin mo na yang panty mo. Girl: Eh natatakot ako doc. Doctor: Don’t worry, I won’t take advantage of you. Tiwala

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Substitute

Doctor: Iha, ano ba trabaho nyo? Girl: Substitute po doc eh. Doctor: Substitute?! Baka naman Prostitute. Girl: Hindi doc. Substitute talaga. Nanay ko yung prostitute.

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Pagsabihan

Sister: Father, pagsabihan nyo naman po yung mga seminarista nyo na wag umihi dyan sa pader ng kumbento. Father: Sige pagsasabihan ko. Pero wag mo

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Meron ako, meron!

Sexy: Wag po! Meron po ako ngayon. Parang awa nyo na wag po! Rapist: Anong meron. Walang meron-meron sa akin. Akin ka ngayon. Nyaaa ha

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Ano ang tawag?

Titser: Maria, ano ang tawag dito (pointing to the male sex organ in the blackboard)? Maria: Mam, meron daddy ko nyan. Pag maliit, ginagamit nya

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Son: Mom, I’m going to the moon someday!
Mom: Nah, son! NASA has already stopped sending monkeys to the moon!